I don't even know where to begin. I've sat down every single day for the past 2 weeks to blog and haven't been able to finish, haven't had anything worthy to say, and it's frustrating as all hell. As writing is one of the things that I've always leaned on, when I can't write it's like... what?! <-- see? Couldn't even complete that sentence.
So, in list form, I'm going to get out all the things currently also frustrating me in hopes that I can move past this writers block and start having something worthwhile to say:
1. School. I'm so bored and unmotivated with school. I can't even begin to explain how ready I am to not be a student any more. It just doesn't feel like I'm doing anything worthwhile with my time and coming off of a very productive summer, it's so frustrating to me. I'm ready to do something else with my life.
2. Piano. Yes, piano is frustrating me. This week we had a test on "Oh When The Saints Go Marching In" on the piano, and I fucked it up royally. I was so nervous I couldn't even play the worlds easiest song. Let's be honest, I almost cried afterwards. THAT'S how frustrating it was.
3. The heat. I love when it's warm outside, and believe me, I am NOT ready for it to be cold. But my apartment feels like a god damn sauna and for some reason, my window won't open to let any sort of fresh air in. It's hot, it's humid, I don't have air conditioning, and it's not only turning me, but others off, as well. I can't even TRY to cook dinner right now because I'll end up hot boxing myself in! (simple solution: buy an air conditioner! Do YOU have any extra cash laying around?)
4. Paying for laundry. Like I said before, it's the bane of my existence. Yesterday I squeezed 3 loads into two just so I wouldn't have to pay another $2.50 to wash and dry. So who even knows if my shit is even clean now! I don't understand why we have to pay to not wear dirty clothes. It's bullshit I tell you!
5. People who just don't get it. Also people who don't listen. And people who do stupid things to be cool. And passive aggressive people. Annoying people. People who talk too much. People who talk down to you. People who don't know when to stop.
You must be a really good friend if you took the time to read this whole post, and I apologize if you did. I haven't been posting anything recently because I want to write things that are good and interesting and not just post something just for the sake of posting. And that's pretty much all this post is, which sucks. But sometimes you just have to write something shitty in hopes that something better will come next time.
2 comments:
A venting post.I like it. No, in fact, I love it. I'm frustrated over small things as well, and I feel like I'm going batshit crazy. I keep telling myself it will get better. It will get better for you as well. You're future is limitless with positive opportunities!
It's your blog, Chelsea, it's where you're allowed to vent and rant and have meaningless posts - or at least ones you find meaningless. I never realized how many people dislike venting/ranting/selfishly expressing themselves in their blogs. It's practically the only reason I have blogs and journals! If it weren't for them, I'd burst! So let it loose! It doesn't matter if what you write only makes sense to you; it's YOUR sanity and you need to find a way to maintain it!
The high today is 81, despite the low during the night being in the low 50s. The constant switch is ruining my body's ability to cope and I'm getting sick because of it. I hate snow, but bring on REAL Fall!
If I had already moved to Boulder, I would let you do laundry at my place for free. I loathed having to do it in public when my machines broke last summer. I found it an inconvenience since I had to /wait/ for it and was afraid someone would steal my clothes if I left.
Ditch your classes and come to school with me! Anthropology and history classes ALL DAY LONG!
hang in there, old friend. we've almost hit the halfway mark. keep your head up<3
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