Wednesday, November 25, 2009

3 months.

The other night I heard Jammin' by Bob Marley at a restaurant and almost started bawling in front of everyone. Then a few nights later, I heard Santeria by Sublime and had to leave the room. I don't have many things that make me cry at the drop of a hat, but Brianna is one of them.

Of course I think about her all the time, but there are very few things that she and I shared that can trigger a specific memory. There are very few memories I have left of us to keep me going.

I like when she pops into my head because it reminds me how much I cared about her. But I don't like the hurt I feel when I hear a song and remember she's not there to appreciate it anymore.

It's been 3 months.

I try to think like she would and that is, "for every moment you waste, there is another right behind to take its place." I am trying to replace every moment of sadness I feel with something happy and memorable, like I know she would have.

Maybe you wonder I keep blogging about her. The answer is, she would have wanted me to. I remember one time she posted a comment on my myspace page that said "so I really think you should put me in your heroes section." She loved when people recognized her in a special way, and she would like that I keep doing this.

And also because, I miss her. So so much.

No comments: