Resolution Follow Up

[I just realized I'm down to 9 months until graduation - I keep calling it my last year, but really it's down to my last few months now! So, seeing as how it's March 1st and we are officially 3 months into the new year, I thought it was time for a follow up to my new years resolutions post. I was very serious about fulfilling my resolutions and making this year great. And in the short time that 3 months is, I feel like I'm on my way.]

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First and foremost, I wanted to work on becoming a better version of myself this year. In my resolutions post, I didn't really elaborate on what that meant to me. But in my mind, that meant finding some sort of self empowerment and being far less passive aggressive in my life. So far, I have surprisingly managed to make both of those things a priority. It's so easy to retreat back into what feels natural (that being passive aggressiveness) but I have really been reminding myself every single day that that is not who I want to be. I have already been put in numerous situations where I have had the chance to retreat, not stand up for myself, let another situation blow over instead of handling it up front...but I've really begun to realize that standing up for myself, demanding respect from friends and peers and teachers, has really made me feel like a whole new person. I've been dealing with things that normally I would let go out of fear of confrontation and I think it's made me a more empowered person, and has strengthened my sense of self worth. Of course, I still have a long way to go in bettering myself as a whole, but in 3 months I feel like that's a pretty good start. And I plan on continuing.

Another part of my resolution was putting myself out there more. I wanted to say yes to more things, have more experiences, take more chances. I think I've definitely started to come out of my shell in this department. I've been meeting new people, getting closer to people who were just classmates before, applying for jobs on a whim, using time that I would otherwise be sleeping to put more effort into things, and I've even said yes to some situations that would have been really easy to make an excuse for. Of course there are still times when I feel scared or don't really feel like putting myself out there but overall I think I'm making this last year of college something to be proud of. It's a start, that's for sure. There's still so many people I say I want to hang out with but then never manage to make it happen - and that's something I intend to change. I don't want to let these friendships pass me by, and in the 9 months I have left, I want to make YOU a bigger part of my life.

I also wanted to write more this year. And I have been. A lot. At this time last year I had written in my blog 21 times. This year, this will be my 21st post BUT accompanied with another blog for social issues, a Tumblr that I've been getting more and more into, and a hand written journal that I've been writing in during times of passion for something big. It's becoming more of a daily outlet for me than just a casual post here and there. It's becoming even more important than it was to me before. Since the start of the year I have acquired 5 new followers WHICH I'm thrilled about (because 5 is a lot for me!). Whenever I get a new one it makes me the happiest little blogger in the world. The support I have from you all means more to me than I can say, and it encourages me to keep writing (and even if you're not a "follower" but still read this, I appreciate you just as much). All 31 of you, I cherish more than if I had 9385907 followers, so I thank you for reading and being in my life in more ways than one.

There's definitely some things I haven't done, because I'm not perfect and I would never pretend to be. I haven't gotten back into working out. I've been walking to school almost every day though, which is a lot more exercise than I was getting last semester. I'm still overwhelmingly scared of change and what's in store for my future. Somehow I'm not sure I'll ever fully embrace change the way I wish I could, but I take it as it comes and deal with it as best I can. Not too much has changed around me since the start of the year, but I know it's on its way and it's time to prepare myself.

In the next few months, my goals are to continue this journey of self empowerment, continue to write more and more, actually SEE and make time for people in my life whose friendships I care so much about, focus on finding a summer internship, and continue saying YES and taking risks. Call it a March Resolution, but I'm continuing on this path until I reach every ounce of happiness I can muster!

[Thank you, from the bottom of my heart for being there, listening, reading, holding me accountable, and supporting me through my ups and downs. 9 months left of this crazy ride, and I'm going to continue to make them count.]
xo