Frustrated.

I don't even know where to begin. I've sat down every single day for the past 2 weeks to blog and haven't been able to finish, haven't had anything worthy to say, and it's frustrating as all hell. As writing is one of the things that I've always leaned on, when I can't write it's like... what?!  <-- see? Couldn't even complete that sentence.

So, in list form, I'm going to get out all the things currently also frustrating me in hopes that I can move past this writers block and start having something worthwhile to say:

1. School. I'm so bored and unmotivated with school. I can't even begin to explain how ready I am to not be a student any more. It just doesn't feel like I'm doing anything worthwhile with my time and coming off of a very productive summer, it's so frustrating to me. I'm ready to do something else with my life.

2. Piano. Yes, piano is frustrating me. This week we had a test on "Oh When The Saints Go Marching In" on the piano, and I fucked it up royally. I was so nervous I couldn't even play the worlds easiest song. Let's be honest, I almost cried afterwards. THAT'S how frustrating it was.

3. The heat. I love when it's warm outside, and believe me, I am NOT ready for it to be cold. But my apartment feels like a god damn sauna and for some reason, my window won't open to let any sort of fresh air in. It's hot, it's humid, I don't have air conditioning, and it's not only turning me, but others off, as well. I can't even TRY to cook dinner right now because I'll end up hot boxing myself in! (simple solution: buy an air conditioner! Do YOU have any extra cash laying around?)

4. Paying for laundry. Like I said before, it's the bane of my existence. Yesterday I squeezed 3 loads into two just so I wouldn't have to pay another $2.50 to wash and dry. So who even knows if my shit is even clean now! I don't understand why we have to pay to not wear dirty clothes. It's bullshit I tell you!

5. People who just don't get it. Also people who don't listen. And people who do stupid things to be cool. And passive aggressive people. Annoying people. People who talk too much. People who talk down to you. People who don't know when to stop.

You must be a really good friend if you took the time to read this whole post, and I apologize if you did. I haven't been posting anything recently because I want to write things that are good and interesting and not just post something just for the sake of posting. And that's pretty much all this post is, which sucks. But sometimes you just have to write something shitty in hopes that something better will come next time.

The Makings of a Great Week

PUMPED ABOUT LIFE TODAY :)

 

It's the first week since I've been back that I have a substantial amount of stuff going on.

School work (yes, I'm actually excited about school work)

Fight Week activities for UFC 135,

and FALL TV!

(starting with Dancing with the Stars tonight - woot!!)

I am so excited I can hardly contain my enthusiasm! 

Plus, I get to see my dad in a few days, and my PR team. 

I. Can't. WAIT.

Like I always say:

Happy Chelsea is the best Chelsea.

Hope your weeks are starting off as fabulous as mine :)

Slumping and Funking.

It's my first funk of the new semester. Surprising? No. Inevitable? Yes. Annoying? Very.

It started with the realization that I'm kind of bored out of my mind right now. I just came off of a SUPER exciting and fast paced summer, and now I'm back into 3 hours a day, not much going on mode. And with this being my last semester + taking filler classes, I have little to no homework to speak of. So yeah, I'm pretty bored. Sure, I've been doing my best to keep busy - dinner with friends, catching up on TV shows I previously had no time to watch, the usual things people do when they have down time. The problem is, I have SO MUCH down time that I'm running out of things to do and it's driving me insane.

The funk was continued when I decided to absolutely 100% pursue my idea of writing an honors thesis this semester in order to A) have something to keep me crazy busy and B) graduate with honors. When I went to talk to my advisor about this, I was informed that I don't "qualify" to write one because my GPA is .2 lower than the requirement. I'm just a little confused as to why I'm paying thousands of dollars a year to be told I'm not qualified to write a paper (silly me for actually WANTING to write a 60 page paper for fun). Anyways, I'm not going to dwell on it because it's not something I can change, as frustrating and annoying as it is.

On top of that I've sat down to blog 3 different times this week and couldn't finish. Writing is one of the few things that has the constant ability to bring me OUT of a slump, and here I am, knee deep in it. I have 3 unfinished drafts and nothing to say. I don't know what the problem is, but I have a feeling it's just the same problem I usually have after any sort of excitement. The thing I like to call THE ANTI-CLIMAX. And it. is. a. bitch.

So I'm looking into possibly getting another internship this semester or volunteering somewhere so I can actually feel like I'm doing something important with my life. Other things I would like to do? Start running again, read more, do yoga, learn how to cook, and search for potential jobs in multiple places for after I graduate.

I feel like this post was pointless. Again, slumping and funking (read it right, people).

Remind yourself.

[via: adviceforallmychildren]

I try to remind myself of this everyday. There's always going to be people in your life who aren't worthy of YOU. Sometimes it takes a really long time to figure out your worth, but it's there. You are worth a lot more than you give yourself credit for.

If there's people in your life who don't treat you right or who manipulate you or make you feel any less than your best, they don't deserve any part of you. Bide your time until you can be in that place you want to be in, but refuse to settle for less than you deserve, even if that means being alone for a while. It's better to be alone and spend your time loving yourself and doing things for yourself than to be surrounded by people who don't make you feel great every single day.

Today remind yourself: I deserve to be happy.

A Top Ten Type of Thursday

There's nothing like sitting in class for an hour and 15 minutes only to realize that you haven't taken a single note since the first five minutes and actually didn't hear a word of the lecture on Henry IV either. Yes, I'm a ridiculously horrible student. But it's fine. It's my 5th year victory lap so I think I'm entitled to a couple of day dreamy days. And for the rec, it's a pretty wimpy semester compared to my last 4, so we're all good. Anyways, as I was daydreaming today in a stuffy and sweaty classroom that smelled like thirty 400 pound football players just practiced in, I imagined all these lists running through my head. Random lists of things I need to do, things I still WANT to do, things I could be doing instead of this, things I'm looking forward to, and things I'm missing right this second. So on this totally tremendous Thursday afternoon, I bring you one of my truly fascinating top 10 lists.

Top 10 things to look forward to most about the Fall:

[in no particular order]

1. Christmas.

Stop. I know what you're thinking. "Chelsea, it's only September, what's wrong with you?" Well what's wrong with me is that I can't freaking wait for Christmas! Seriously, I had this moment mid-July where one of the songs from the Charlie Brown Christmas special came on my itunes shuffle and BAM. I was transfixed in a merry, happy, holiday-spirit state of mine. And boy did it feel good. And also bad, because it was like torture. It's so far away, but I honestly can't wait for the Christmas season and to spend yet another year with my family.

2. UFC 135: JONES vs. RAMPAGE

It's only a couple weeks away now and I'm STOKED for it. Mostly because I'm excited to see my whole PR team and help out with another exciting event. I'm so excited to have everyone here in my town and be able to continue participating with UFC even though my internship is technically over. It's going to come around just in the nick of time to kick the homesickness right out of me. PLUS, my dad is coming in town for the fight so I'll get to have some quality time with the pops which I'm equally, if not more stoked about.

[and yes, I do realize this is not the updated artwork]

3. Fall weather.

Yes folks, it's arriving quickly. One second it was hotter than hell, and the next it was pouring rain and immediately following the rain, was Fall. And I love fall. What's not to love about Fall weather? It's perfect. And I'm convinced that Boulder is the most beautiful city in the world (or at least in America) during Fall. Try and challenge it. Just try.

4. Pumpkin Spice Lattes.

Ooooook, I know what you're thinking now. "Really, Chelsea? That's something to look forward to?" Well it is. And I love it. They put me in the holiday spirit and nothing makes me happier than being in a holiday spirit. So, pumpkin spice lattes --> holiday spirit --> happy Chelsea. And a happy Chelsea is the best Chelsea.

5. MYLO XYLOTO.

Coldplay's new album. Coming out October 24th. I'm so freaking excited for this I could literally (but probably not) pee myself. On that day, I will not only be out of commission listening to this album non-stop, I will no doubt be the happiest girl on the planet. They never disappoint me, and I NEED their sweet music to survive! I'm so dramatic, I know. If there's one sure way to my heart, get me to a Coldplay concert by whatever means possible. No, scratch that. I'm taking myself because I don't think anyone loves them as much as me. Ok, maybe my brother, Connor. I'll go with him. 

6. Halloween. 

For many reasons. First, I'm having a little visitor to my home that weekend, and second... it's Halloween. Ever since I was a wee baby, my dad put on the biggest and best Halloween show you've ever seen. I'm talkin' black lights, scary ass music, a full on HOMEMADE graveyard with custom graves for all the neighbors, and the most intense, sometimes hilarious costumes you've ever seen. Man I miss it. Nothing ever quite lives up to Halloween as a kid, but every time it rolls around I get super pumped.

7. Thanksgiving.

 Yes, there are three holidays on this list. But, that's one HUGE reason why I love the Fall so much. Thanksgiving will be my first time going "home" to Vegas since the summer. And right now it seems SO far away. But I get to go for like 11 days so it's going to be a pretty awesome vacation. Plus, by then our new house will (hopefully) be up and running and it will feel awesome to have a NORMAL Thanksgiving with my family. We haven't really had a "normal" one in years because it's always just been 4 of us, and the last 4 years have consisted of going out to eat for Thanksgiving dinner. Which is nice and all but sort of lame. Hopefully there will be no buffets or food poisoning  this year (note to self: do NOT eat salmon in Colorado on Thanksgiving). And hopefully there will be more family this year as well!

8. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt. 2 on DVD.

It's true. When part 1 came out on DVD I admittedly skipped class to go buy and watch it. I will no doubt be doing the same thing for part 2. I'm a little shocked and angry with myself because I only saw it TWICE in theaters. But hang onto your sorting hat, kids, because it's still showing! Yes, I know! Death. I want it out on DVD NOW. Maybe I'll sneak in one more showing before it comes out, eh?

9. Graduating.

Ok, technically I guess I'll be graduating in the winter, but still. It's fall semester so it counts. I think I'm ready for this. I've been a student my whole life but I think I'm ready to move on and see what comes next. It's scary and weird but it's like the rest of my life waiting for me outside the doors of college and I'm interested to see where I'm going to end up. And now talking about it has made me scared again. Oh boy.

10. Spending my last semester of college doing anything and everything I want.

It actually rocks that I have the opportunity right now to do whatever I want. I have semi-easy classes for the first time in my college career, and tons of free time to spend however I want. So far I haven't been spending it doing too many exciting things, but I do have a pretty extensive list of things I would like to spend my time doing for the next few months. But, I shall save that list for next time :)

Thanks for tuning into this fascinating and stimulating top 10 list of things I'm looking forward to this Fall. What are you looking forward to?