2013 in Best Memories.

Looking back on a year is always bittersweet. You realize what moments defined your year, good or bad, and you see how much you've changed. It's interesting how these moments in time make up the years, and all the years make up a lifetime of memories. That's why I like looking back on the best moments of this small moment in time. I'm building my lifetime of memories with each passing year. So without further ado, here are my top 10 best moments from 2013 that I'm saving into my memory vault and taking with me forever.

10. Jack White

My roommate Leah was dying to get a cat when we moved in together. It had only been like, 2 months so I was a little reluctant for fear that if being roommates somehow didn't work out this might complicate things. But as soon as we went to meet the little guy I knew he was ours (technically he's Leah's but not-so-technically he's ours). He's been a complete joy in our lives - so well behaved and the cuddliest thing you've ever met. He's also huge, but that just kinda makes me love him more. Wanna know why we named him Jack White? He's got a little random white stripe on his back. Get it? My idea.

9. Anderson Silva get's KO'd

Yes, this was absolutely one of my favorite moments from 2013 because I got to see it live. It was totally historical. Anderson Silva, the Middleweight champion of the UFC with the longest title defense streak in history, gets knocked out by Chris Weidman. But not only that, he was acting cocky and taunting Weidman throughout the whole fight until it came back to bite him in the ass. It was historic. So much adrenaline was pumping through my veins that night. And although their recent rematch sadly ended in Silva breaking his leg in a serious injury and not at all in the way anyone would have liked to see it go, I'll always remember their first fight and how exciting it was to be there in person.

8. iHeart Radio

My mom passed up the opportunity to go with my dad to the iHeart Radio Music Festival (who does that?!) so he took me as his date for the first night, and it was incredible. I got to see so many big names and some of my favorite artists of all time in one sitting. Fun, Muse (for the second time this year), Keith Urban, Elton John (for the second time), Katy Perry, Queen featuring Adam Lambert.. just to name a few. It was epic. One of the greatest and most fun nights of the entire year. So hoping I get to go again next year.

7. Seattle

This year, my annual trip to Seattle was for Connor's big 21st birthday which I had been looking forward to for many moons. But it was made extra special because one of my lifelong best friends, Katie was spending the summer in Washington and was able to join us for the festivities. I haven't seen her in way too long, so it was just the perfect storm to catch up with her and partake in our usual shenanigans. Oh, Katie. You were most definitely a highlight of my year.

6. Surprise 24th birthday party

For my 24th birthday, Leah threw me my first-ever surprise shindig at our place with our good friend (and AMAZING chef) Justin who made gourmet burritos for everyone (my favorite food) before we headed downtown for a golf-style pub crawl. I even got up and sang at a piano bar. It was just one of the most thoughtful things anyone has ever done for me, and I'm still sentimental about it 6 months later.

5. Moving in with Leah

The stars really aligned for me and Leah this year. We found the perfect apartment in the perfect location, and the timing could not have been better. So far it's been the best roommate experience either of us have ever had, and I feel so lucky. I love our place, our cat, our first Christmas tree, our balcony overlooking Downtown Las Vegas, and especially our friendship. Moving in together was definitely the best decision we could have made for our budding lives out here in Sin City.

4. Meeting Annie

My cousin Sara and her husband Drew had a baby in August! It's the first baby to come into our family since Sara's brother Chad, 14 years ago, so it was a pretty big deal. Unfortunately they live in New York City, so we didn't get to meet the little nugget right away, which we were all aching for. Lucky for me, I had the opportunity to fly to NYC for a weekend on my way to DC for a business trip. It worked out perfectly and I got to spend some quality time with my niece-cousin in her second month of life. It was so special. I can't wait to watch this beautiful baby grow up.

3. Mumford & Sons

This show was a MUST for me in 2013. Unfortunately/not-so-unfortunately their closest tour stop to me was in San Bernardino, CA so as a double whammy, I got to drive to LA and stay with Cory for a couple days before she joined me at the show. When they first announced their tour, I had to sign up to even be invited to purchase tickets. So when I got the email that I was invited, I think I probably peed myself? It was one of those shows that tops the list of the most life-changing shows I've ever seen, made even better with my best friend by my side.

2. Life is Beautiful

Speaking of best shows ever...I went to my first music festival in 2013, Life Is Beautiful. Can you imagine seeing Janelle Monae, Childish Gambino, Capital Cities, Pretty Lights, Dawes, Imagine Dragons, The Killers, and Empire of the Sun right in your back yard? Because I did, and it was literally one of the best weekends of my entire life. I'm still struggling to put into words just how epic this festival was, and I'm counting down the seconds until LIB 2014. It's me and Cory's new annual tradition.

1. Ireland

In 2013, I went to Ireland. I finally made it out of the US and took a trip overseas. It was an enormous milestone for me both personally and professionally. Not only did I get to take my first trip abroad, I got to represent my company internationally which is a pretty big deal. This trip really sparked my budding passion for travel, and gave me the itch to see more of the world. I loved every moment spent on the Emerald Isle, and I'm making it my mission to get back to Dublin one day.

Overall, 2013 was a solid year. Music, travel, new family members, and friendship. That's what life is all about my friends, and life is beautiful.

Life Is Beautiful: The Prequel

I've been putting off these posts for nearly a week now because I just felt like I didn't have the emotional capacity to sit down and pour my heart out about last weekend's Life Is Beautiful Festival. Not that I haven't WANTED to, I just haven't been able to face the fact that it's really over. It came and went in the blink of an eye, leaving me with just a beautiful bubble in my brain filled with incredible music, food, art, learning, and most of all, love.

The past year of my life has been leading up to this moment. When I first heard about the festival at the Downtown low-down last year, I wasn't sure how excited to let myself get because so often in this start-up land I'm living in, dreams don't always come to fruition. Sometimes you work so hard at something and it just doesn't pan out. It's a sad truth we see on a daily basis as companies come and go, striving with their whole being to make their million dollar idea work. I thought Life Is Beautiful sounded like a brilliant idea with so much heart and passion behind it, but I was skeptical - mostly for my own heart because the thought of this festival seemed too good to possibly be true. But one day, things started happening. Digital Royalty started working with them. It started creeping closer. I got more and more excited on a daily basis hearing rumors of what was possibly to come. Then they threw a party and announced their music line-up and I was at the absolute peak of my 20-something happiness because some of my favorite artists in all the land were set to appear in my own back yard at this first-year festival.

My favorite moment from the line-up reveal party was that my roommate, Leah already knew one of my favorite bands, Empire of the Sun, was going to be at the festival weeks before it was announced. She somehow kept it a complete secret from me, and watched my face as they were announced during the line-up reveal. We were both so god damn happy. I don't know if anyone in the world was happier than we were at that moment in time. I knew right then and there that LIB was going to change my life forever, and the countdown to festival-time began.

So I begged my best friend, Cory, to come out for the festival, knowing that because our hearts have beat to the same rhythm for nearly 20 years, this was something that would definitely change her life, too. I couldn't let her miss it. So I begged and brought it up in conversation every chance I got until one day the stars lined up so perfectly in our favor and we got the green light. She bought a plane ticket and I bought her a festival ticket and we screamed like the little 6 year olds we were when we met. This vision of the festival was becoming a real-life, breathing entity in our worlds. Not to sound too overly cheesy, but it was a lot like the feeling you get when you start falling in love - something I haven't felt in a long time.

As it crept closer, all I could think about was the fact that I knew something big was about to rock my world. And I was ready for it. Cory arrived late Thursday night and we anxiously spent her first night in Vegas catching up on all our "emergency updates" - the good things and the not-so-good things. Regardless, it felt like Christmas Eve as we went to sleep. I was so anxious to wake up the next morning and show her around my town that was in the process of its incredible transformation into LIB-Land. The miraculous murals being painted on the sides of buildings, tents, lights, and stages going up around every corner. The city I live in was like I've never seen it before. We walked around taking pictures and making ourselves crazy with excitement for the following day when the festivities would finally commence, and to top it off, our excited pre-mature strolling of the festival footprint landed us on the front page of the Las Vegas Review Journal. Beat that.

We opted to spend Friday night in, knowing that Saturday and Sunday were slated to be jam-packed with as much food, booze, and running around that our bodies could muster. So we had a real slumber party, including cookie baking, Footloose-viewing, and dancing around the kitchen to all the songs we were going to hear the following day. We attempted to do "handstand twerking" (not recommended) and ended up sprawled out on the floor laughing, like we do. Guys, you'll never understand how much I love my best friend.

As emotions start to fill my brain, realizing that I'm about to take a deep dive into the greatest weekend of my young adult life, I know it's time to break for the night. I'll have to relive this in waves, so I can do it the proper justice it deserves. Stay tuned!

The Emerald Isle.

I'm just getting back to my routine after a travel coma, which consisted of 8 jet-lagged days in Ireland, 14 hours of travel back to the states, 13 hours of sleep, multiple loads of laundry, and now laryngitis. It felt wonderful to get back to the US, but I'm already missing the Emerald Isle.

Our first big pit-stop: Kylemore Abbey Castle

My journey to Ireland was for a business trip, which was already going to be a huge opportunity for me both personally and professionally. First of all, I've never traveled outside of the US (except to Puerto Rico, if you count that, which I don't) so that in itself was thrilling. Second, the opportunity to represent my company is always an honor, and I was especially excited to have the opportunity to represent Digital Royalty in another country, while also broadening my own personal knowledge of the world. I've always felt so naive having never been outside of the US. There's a whole world out there with billions of people to meet, and it was refreshing to get a small glimpse of what lies beyond. I met people from Croatia, Zagreb, Amsterdam, UAE, Istanbul, England, and of course, Ireland. After meeting so many wonderful and unique people, I officially have the itch to travel all over the world, and hopefully one day visit these new friends.

So like I said, the trip was for business, but my colleague and travel partner, Erinn, suggested we tack on a couple extra days at the front end for personal time. I definitely couldn't argue with that, so I let her take the lead and she ran with it. She put on her travel agent hat and planned everything down to a T. After flying all day and night on Friday, we landed in Dublin early Saturday morning and immediately hopped on a bus across the country to Galway. We checked into our hotel and instantly passed out for a long nap. Unfortunately by the time we woke up for dinner, almost every restaurant in town was closed, but we eventually found something, ate, and then went right back to sleep.

The next morning when we finally woke up, we rented a car so we could do a bit of exploring. Let me tell you how terrifying driving in Ireland was. Luckily Erinn drove the whole time, while I white knuckled my seatbelt and door handle - not because of her driving, but because the roads in Ireland are ALL two way roads, one lane on each side, there's absolutely no shoulder, and the lanes are extremely narrow. Top that off with the fact that we were driving on the opposite side of the road and you could color us terrified (mostly me). But even though my pre-existing car anxiety was taken to new heights, it was totally worth it because we got to see a ton of the country which we wouldn't have been able to do otherwise.

So we drove to a little town called Clifden - population: less than 1,000. It was a cute little down where we met a few locals and had a few drinks in one of the pubs. It was just how you would picture it - young people playing musical jigs on their accordions, and taking turns breaking out in Irish dancing. Seriously guys, it was exactly what I pictured Ireland to be like.

After a night in Clifden, we made another terrifying and treacherous drive to see the Cliffs of Moher. The drive from Clifden to the Cliffs was about 2.5 hours, up a winding road to pretty much the tip top of Ireland. I can't even begin to express how car sick I was at this point, but dear god it was worth it. You might recall this scene from the Princess Bride, or this scene from Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. That's where I was, and it was one of the most insanely beautiful things I've ever seen in my entire life. I can't get over it. I'm still in awe that this exists in the world, and that I got the chance to see it with my own two eyes.

After the Cliffs, we drove back to Galway and stayed just outside of town in a place called Barna. We checked into a lovely hotel, and after a full day of driving and car sickness, we were excited to finally get a full nights sleep, and maybe, just maybe this would be the night we finally got enough sleep to kick the jet lag and officially be on Ireland's watch. That is, until we noticed a gigantic spider on the window curtains. By gigantic, I mean bigger than the size of my fist. So of course, we panicked and called someone at the front desk to come kill it (seriously, what would YOU have done?!), but by the time they arrived in our room (with only a tissue in hand) the spider had mysteriously disappeared into the curtains. And then we never found him again. Needless to say, neither of us slept a wink that night.

The next day, we returned our rental car and made our way to the train station where we hitched a ride back to Dublin. Both deliriously tired, we attempted to work on the train which was kind of a fail. When we got to Dublin, we checked into our beautiful hotel, The Morrison, freshened up, and made our way to the Guinness Factory. It was definitely a highlight of the trip, and the tour was pretty incredible. Not only do they teach you how Guinness is made and the history behind the beer, they also teach you how to pour the perfect pint and drink it properly (yes, there is a wrong way to drink beer). The tour ends at the very top of the factory in their circular bar that overlooks all 360 degrees of the city. And the beer tasted heavenly.

At this point, playtime was pretty much over and we started cracking down on work. We hosted our third live Google Hangout for DoubleTree by Hilton, and met all of the Socialites who flew in for our camp at a lovely dinner reception. The rest of the trip went swimmingly with 2 days of training and a special tour of the Jameson Distillery for all of the Socialites, where we got to do a whiskey tasting. All bias aside, Jameson just might be the one to get me to start drinking whiskey again.

From the left: Scotch, Jameson, Jack Daniels. Triple Distilled FTW.

We also had dinner at Ireland's oldest pub, The Brazen Head, established in 1198. I personally am most impressed with the fact that 800+ years after opening their doors, they've embraced Twitter. On our last night, I helped host my first ever Tweet-up event, another exciting professional milestone.

It rained the entire time we were in Ireland, and all the locals kept apologizing for the nasty weather, but it couldn't have been more perfect to me. Coming from the desert where it hardly ever rains, I was in heaven and enjoying the dreary, wet days. It made the city just that much more charming.

The flight home was long, freezing, and all around miserable, but I did make the most of it by watching the Breaking Bad finale which I missed while overseas, and 2 other movies in between shivering and failing to take anything that even closely resembled a nap (note to self: sedation!). However, I would take a 16 hour day of traveling to be able to experience another country any day. I'm so grateful to have had this opportunity, and it's one I will take with me and cherish for life.

Scenes from South Dakota.

A couple weeks ago, the Digital Royalty team took a 5 day retreat to our boss Amy's cabin in the Black Hills of South Dakota. It was nice to get out of Las Vegas for a while and get into nature - even though it's been reaffirmed that I can't handle bugs of any kind, and I'm very clearly a city person who requires a working toilet in her life. We ate, drank, and bonded over things we weren't expecting to bond over (should I mention the toilet situation here again or can you just use your imagination?), and most importantly, came back alive, hungover, and exhausted. Overall, a great trip.

A few of my favorite highlights:

Commemorating our first plane ride together with a round of Bloody Mary's.

Plane ride shenanigans.

Amazing rain & hail storms.

Our day on Lake Pactola.

Roomie love on the lake.

Enjoying Mount Rushmore.

The most amazing sunsets.

Baby G.

This morning at 2:29am, my cousin Sara and her husband Drew welcomed a sweet little baby girl into the world, Anne Kelly Gehling (or as I will call her for the rest of her life, Baby G). I haven't even met her yet and I already love her with my whole heart.

This is the first baby of our generation in the Ford family, which makes her extra special. It was surreal, but also one of the happiest moments I've ever expereinced, waking up to a picture of my new baby niece (technically she's my 2nd cousin, but that just doesn't seem fitting). Tears swelled up in my eyes and I smiled all morning while I thought about how Sara held my hand as I grew up and what light she's continuously brought into my life. Little Annie is coming into the world surrounded by the same.

I am so unbelievably happy for all three of them, but especially Baby G, because I know she's going to grow up with the absolute best parents ever in existence, and will be surrounded by an infinite amount of love and happiness and laughter throughout her entire life.

Welcome to the world, Baby G. I can't wait to meet you.

4 years.

Every year on this day I wake up feeling sentimental and sad. August 25th never used to mean anything to me - it was just a regular day in my book. But that changed all in an instant one sunny afternoon as I was walking through campus in Boulder. It's been 4 years to the day since my sweet friend, Brianna passed away.

This morning as I was pondering over a cup of coffee and internally sharing some memories with myself, I re-read this letter I wrote to Brianna on the two year anniversary of her death. The time that's passed seems like a blur now, but somehow through my state of shock and grief (that lasted much longer than what should have been normal), I was able to articulate these timeless words that really resonated this morning:

"In the very last weekend I spent in Parker, right before I moved to Vegas, when I knew it would be the last weekend I ever spent in that town, I drove by your old house where I used to pick you up every morning before school. I sat there in the car staring at your house and just cried. I felt like if I left Parker, I was abandoning your memory. But I've realized I'll never be able to leave you behind because you mean too much to me. You're always going to have a huge place in my heart, no matter where I am in the world."

I remember feeling like if I moved on and moved away from our hometown, that meant letting her go. And although on some level, leaving our neighborhood that was haunted with the memory of her helped with the grieving process, I never really could (or would) let her go. I have not returned to Parker since I moved. It's been almost 2 years since I've set foot in that town, but I have never once for a second stopped loving or learning from her, because no matter where I am in the world, she'll always have a huge place in my heart.

I guess it's true that time heals all wounds, I'm just not the most patient person on the planet. For almost 2 years I cried regularly and grieved hard over the loss of Brianna. I blamed myself a lot, even though her death was not my fault. But somewhere over time, I started to cope. The wound isn't fresh anymore, but there will always be a dull pain in my heart. A cringing feeling in my stomach on this day each year that still lies in disbelief of the things I've heard and seen. But life doesn't stop and we have to keep moving forward. Brianna would have wanted us to all move forward and experience life to the fullest, like she always tried to do. So that's what I have to try and do, for her.

It's hard to believe that 4 years has passed in the blink of an eye. I'm a different person, and I'm sure she would have been too. But I'll continue cling to her beautiful memory and all the things she taught me throughout her life and her death, because she changed me. And I'll never, ever stop loving or missing her, no matter where I am in this world.

Just Don't Worry About It.

Pretty much all my life I've struggled with anxiety. I can remember back to being a kid and having anxiety attacks about something I said or did on the playground or in the classroom that would eat away at me for weeks. Of course, at the time I didn't realize what it was, but as I grew older and it kept happening I realized I'm just kind of an anxious person, and I went through my whole childhood like that.

It got so bad when I was in college that I was giving myself these debilitating stomach aches on a daily basis, to the point where I would get nauseous and start sweating and panicking so badly I honestly thought I would pass out at any second from the intense stomach pain - often times this happened when I was in public, but I would keep it internal. I finally went and got tested for a bunch of things to see if there was something physically wrong with me because I didn't realize that my mental state was actually causing my body to have a physical reaction until the doctors came back with absolutely nothing wrong. And that's when I knew exactly what was wrong.

You see, it's really not easy to struggle with anxiety. You second guess everything you say and do and you're always wondering if what you've said or done is good enough or how it was perceived by everyone else. A thought might randomly pop into your head about something you just remembered you said several weeks ago that will cause you to go into a spiraling panic, start re-evaluating your whole life, and start plotting your move across the country where you can start over and never have to see the person you made that little comment to ever again, even though in reality they probably didn't even notice, care, or frankly will ever think about again. Meanwhile your stomach is churning for days and you're cringing about how stupid you feel for whatever the incident was. Your mind cannot shift away from it until you just can't help but start panicking and wishing you were never born. And then when you finally get over that one, something else pops into your head and the cycle starts again. At least that's usually how it went for me.

So one day I had a thought: I don't have to live like this. And I don't WANT to live like this. Constantly making yourself feel like you could projectile vomit all over everything at any second because you're having an internal panic attack that no one knows about but you is a sad way to go through life. So I realized I had two options. I could either go back to the doctor with my self-diagnosis and ask for some medication that would curb the anxiety but potentially make me feel like a zombie, or I could teach myself how to deal with it. I chose the latter.

I had a breaking point about a year and a half ago when something major happened in my life. I won't go into detail but at the time it felt like the emotional equivalent of someone close to me dying. No one died, for the record, but my anxiety told me to react in the same way. I was panicking and literally started debating packing up and moving somewhere else to start over, which thankfully only ended up turning into a spontaneous week-long trip to LA to visit my best friend and clear my head. Needless to say, I cried and hyperventilated the whole 4 hour drive to LA, and when I got back I decided that I was never going to let THAT happen to me again.

So what did I do? I taught myself how to breathe. I taught myself how to calm down. I taught myself to stop caring what other's thought about me. But most importantly I taught myself to start liking ME. I never really thought about the good qualities I have, like the fact that I'm funny (at least I think I'm funny, and that's all that counts in this situation), I'm smart, I'm a good person, and I put others before myself. And if someone thinks a comment I made is weird and they want to judge me for that, then it's not something I can control, and they're not people I want in my circle. They're the ones missing out on having me in their life, not the other way around. I decided right then that I didn't need or want anyone around me who made me feel like I had to second guess myself, so I began the difficult process of weeding out the people who did. And voila, I instantly started feeling this giant weight lifting off me. I started feeling worthy of being happy and not being so concerned with how I was perceived by everyone around me. I had to train my brain to stop caring and be ok with letting the real Chelsea shine through.

Don't get me wrong, this was extremely difficult and something I'm still working at for sure. It took me a long time to re-train my brain with no professional help whatsoever. But it's been a long while since I've had an anxiety attack and I know that it's because of the combination of people I now have in my life, and some simple advice I was given, "just don't worry about it." Stop worrying so much. Life is too damn short to be so unhappy and self conscious of every little thing. I'm weird, so what? Someday I'm gonna find my weirdo counterpart and nothing else will matter because I won't have to put up a front for anyone. Someone is going to love the best and the weirdest sides of me. And that's how it should be. I already have my weirdo friend-counterparts, which tells me I'm not alone and I'm never going to be alone. Plus, no one is worth that kind of anxiety in the long run of your life so there's no sense in getting all uptight over something that doesn't make you happy or make you a better person.

So the moral of the story is, it's not a losing battle. We all just need to embrace ourselves and our weirdness, because in the end no one can make you happy but yourself. And finding inner happiness is the key to finding happiness with others (or so I've been told).

I also love this Thought Catalog post titled, Everyone Is Weird. But more on that later.

Sweetness in Seattle.

Last weekend I returned to Seattle for my little brother's big 21st birthday. The other two times I've been there were both so special in their own right, so I was really looking forward to going back. This trip was no different, except that it may have been even MORE special because of a few select guest stars - Uncles Prescott & Paul, and my best friend from high school, Katie, who's living in Washington this summer. Side note: Seeing her was the best part of my summer, hands down. If love equals happiness, then this girl is the love of my life. For sure.

It was a quick 3-day weekend, we flew in on Friday afternoon and flew back Sunday afternoon (in time to pop off 3 episodes of Orange is the New Black which everyone on the trip was raving about. Turns out it's my new obsession, but back to the point). We got to spend some quality family time and explore the city a bit, which I've decided I need to come back and do more of. The next time I make the trip up to the Pacific North West, I'm staying longer than 3 days and hopefully will have a back healthy enough to walk around the hilly city and see it all.

Seattle is such an inspiring town. It's so big compared to Downtown Las Vegas and there's so many unique things I have yet to explore. It's a dream of mine to get lost in the city on a rainy day, pop into a coffee shop, and just let my fingers flow for hours. I think I could imagine living there one day, and each time I go back I'm reminded that I CAN live there, if I ever decided to take the plunge. Eeeek.

Anyways, my baby brother is 21 now and I got to take him out drinking for the first time ever. This is a big deal people, because Connor doesn't drink. Not that I wanted him to turn him into a lush, but I wanted to have that experience with him and now I'm looking forward to sharing a beer with him over dinner, or a glass of wine on Christmas, or taking him into a bar in my 'hood next time he's in town. The possibilities are endless. I remember when I was 20 and all my friends were legal except for me and I felt like I was missing out on the whole world because I couldn't set foot in a bar. I'm excited to be able to share the places I go and the social aspect of sharing a drink over some good conversation with Connor.

The first-ever sibling shot: A Buttery Nipple. Let this go down in history.

Cheers, little bro. I love you more each day.

Welcome to your mid twenties.

As my sister so eloquently (and somewhat shockingly) put it "You're no longer in your early twenties." I initially thought "COOL!" but then after a moment thought, "Oh shit, the era of my early twenties is over." But, to be honest, I'm glad to see them go, because I'm ready for the next phase of my young adult life. What will the next few years bring before I'm in my late twenties? Only time will tell, but I'm excited and eager to find out.

So back to turning 24. I'm usually pretty low-key about my birthdays. Aside from when I turned 21 in the most epic of fashions, I'm not one to make a big deal out of my birthday. I'm content to just have a nice dinner with a few close friends and call it a day. Don't get me wrong, I definitely enjoy doing SOMETHING, I'm just not big on planning celebrations on behalf of myself. With that being said, my incredible roommate, Leah took it upon herself to see that this non-milestone of a birthday was more memorable than any I've had in years.

It started with a simple "Don't worry about it, I've got something in mind." So I let it be, thinking she was probably planning a dinner or something. But as it creeped closer and I still didn't know what our plans were, I started getting suspicious. It was Thursday afternoon and I still didn't know who, what, when, or where something - if anything - was happening.

So on Friday a couple of co-workers and dear friends of mine (Julie & Jess) told me they wanted to take me out for a happy hour drink after work. I happily agreed and left work a few minutes early to go home and freshen up. Well, if you know my friends or our group of co-workers at all, you'd probably know that nothing ever goes according to a timed plan. So happy hour is running a little late (not surprising), and we decide to just grab a drink at Julie & TJ's apartment instead (3 floors down from where Leah and I live). I'm cool with that - it's Friday, just beer me!

So we chatted for a while until Jess realized she needed to go move her car from her metered space. I offered to go with her, and when we stepped outside I noticed my god-sister Lindsey's car parked outside my apartment complex. I knew it was hers because she has a very distinct vanity plate, but of course she denied she was there and told me she was at home in her PJ's. Noooope. I knew right then something was up.

So a little while later Julie & Jess somehow convinced me that we needed to stop by my apartment for something, so we headed upstairs. I was a little anxious since I had a feeling something was going on, but I wasn't sure what. So we walk in the door and my roommate is standing there with a margarita in hand while a few other people (Lindsey included!) jumped out and yelled "Surprise!" It was a special moment, followed by the realization that our friend Justin (who happens to be an AMAZING chef) had cooked up a burrito bar in my apartment as well. My favorite food + my favorite people. What could be better? I was blown away at this point at the thoughtfulness of it all.

But it didn't stop there: Leah then explained to me that they had another surprise in store. They had come up with a game for the night - a golf-style pub crawl. Being the creative graphic designer that she is, she made up a card for everyone to wear around their necks that had 8 bars listed on it, and a few drinks at each bar - you would earn a score for whichever drink you drank (with the idea that you wanted to get the lowest score possible because golf, duh). Side note: before we took off on the pub-crawl, it started torrentially down pouring (with lightning), which we could only laugh about. So we ate burritos in the rain and right before we left I snapped this pic of the amazing sunset peeking through the clouds. It was magical.

So notice above at the bar "Don't Tell Mama" the hole-in-one says "Chelsea Sings." That's a piano bar in town that I've drunkenly sang at once or twice in front of a select few people. But this was on another level because there was a group of around 20 people that I knew in there (and tons more that I didn't know). But that was the name of the game and I couldn't NOT sing, right? So I got up on stage and gave Cyndi Lauper's "Time After Time" my best shot. It's not karaoke, so it's just you and the guy on the piano - no lyrics, no background music, no distractions. It's intimidating! But I had an absolute blast.

We only ended up making it to 4 bars before we had to call it a night, but I was absolutely blown away with the creativity and thought that was put into making it a special night. I couldn't have asked for anything more. I literally have the BEST roommate anyone could ask for. She's a huge light in my life and she made me feel more special than I have in years. No one has ever done anything like that for me and I just can't thank her enough. She, and all my friends, really, made me feel like I was worth celebrating, and that's not something I'm necessarily accustomed to, so it was really very special. I can't accurately express how grateful I am.

The rest of the weekend was super low-key, and exactly what I needed. We had a hangover brunch at my apartment on Saturday morning (breakfast burritos made out of leftovers from the night before), went to the pool, and relaxed. Then on Sunday (my actual day of birth) a few of us went and had brunch at one of my favorite places in town, Baby Stacks (yes, I'm obsessed with having brunch). Later on I had cocktails and dinner with my parents which was an awesome way to end the weekend.

Overall, turning 24 turned out to be pretty epic. 23 was a GREAT year in Chelsea history, so I'm excited to see what the first year of my mid-twenties have in store for me. As long as I'm surrounded by this incredible group of people I currently have in my life, I know it's gonna be fabulous.

Moments of bliss.

I had a realization the other day that I'm like, really happy. I've been having all these little moments of bliss recently where I catch myself feeling overwhelmingly happy. I get giddy and my heart starts racing and I'm overcome with this genuine feeling of pure joy all around me. Sounds kinda cheesy. It's an awesome feeling for sure, but it's strange because a year ago I never actually thought I would ever be so blissfully happy about anything in my life. I never thought I would get to the point where I could say that I'm completely happy and actually mean it.

I honed into this on Sunday night when I was at the Mumford & Sons concert in San Bernardino with my lifelong best friend, Cory and my co-workers, Julie & TJ. It was the perfect day, seeing an artist I adore for the first time in person, and with people I love to death. Every song they played I thought to myself, "there's no way I could ever be happier than I am right now." And then they would play another song and I'd feel myself elevating to a new level. If I had to define what absolute, unwavering happiness looks like to me, it's that. I wish I could bottle that feeling.

I think I had just gotten so used to just floating through life without really being 100% content with much around me. (How terrible is that?) I didn't really realize it until I got to the point where I actually WAS happy. A year ago today, for example, I was pretty much faking happiness on every level. 

I first started experiencing these moments of bliss when I was interning a couple summers ago at UFC. It was so refreshing at the time because I wasn't excited or inspired by anything in my day to day life. That summer was like a whole new section that I had added into my world that showed me what it felt like to not feel flat. I wasn't just going through the motions - I was LIVING.

Then after my internship I continued searching for that feeling again, with no such luck for quite some time. When I started working at Digital Royalty last summer I felt it start coming back. The common denominators here? Vegas and work. But not just any work - both times I've had jobs that I absolutely adored. That's such a huge part of it. I don't ever want to be in a situation where I'm working at a dead end job, unhappy and just there because I have to be. I'm lucky that I've never had to do that.

I felt it again on Monday night - making that two big times in less than 24 hours - when they announced the lineup of the Life Is Beautiful Festival coming to my city (literally 2 blocks from my apartment) in October. I get to be a part of this brand new, inaugural festival in MY city, where some of my favorite artists of all time are going to be playing. When they announced the lineup I think I screamed louder and smiled bigger than I ever have in my entire life. And I haven't stopped smiling since. It's going to be life-changing.

The point of this is, I hope I never go back to being that static version of myself I was for so long. THIS is who I am. I started laughing at basically everything I do because I've stopped taking myself too seriously. I get to go to live shows every other week and have good friends and co-workers who I can be myself around and who really do want to spend time shooting the shit, listening to my ideas, and have respect for me as a person. I don't lose sleep over the past anymore. And I love my job, apartment, roommate, and city I'm living in. I will never take for granted how lucky I am to be young and in love with my life at this moment in time.

DC.

I've had the opportunity to go to Washington DC three times so far this year for work. The first two were for meetings that lasted only a couple hours before turning around and flying home, but the third was for something pretty cool that I got to be a part of.

Two of my co-workers (Alana & Erinn) and I went to DC this past week for DoubleTree by Hilton's "Socialite Camp." Pretty much two full days of social media training and brainstorming with the top "social media champions" among all 300+ DoubleTree properties. And for a social media nerd like me, it was a blast. I learned a lot and got to present my first in-person social media training for our client. It was actually a really big accomplishment and a step forward in my career. Pretty big moment.

Me, Alana, Erinn on our long trek home from DC.

But aside from the work aspect of it all, this time around I actually had some down time (late at night) to explore a bit of the city. The first two times I went to DC this year we're so short it was literally in and out in less than 24 hours. But being there for a couple days this time was a much different experience.

After the first 16-hour day we decided to cram in a little trip to the National Mall so I could see the Lincoln Memorial for the first time ever. Talk about an awe-inspiring moment. I was stunned. It really was one of those moments where you can't believe you're actually standing in front of this giant thing you've seen millions of pictures of for your entire life. It was so much bigger than I imagined and so much more triumphant. Standing at the bottom of the stairs leading up to the memorial and seeing Lincoln through the pillars was unreal. But getting up close? Almost emotional.

Not to mention when you turn around you're standing directly in front of the Reflecting Pool and Washington Monument. A little dark, but I'm adding to my bucket list: Watch the sun rise over the Washington Monument from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial.

We also made our cab driver drive us past the White House (because duh, Obama) but unfortunately it's pretty hard to see it from the road. Covered in trees and kinda far away. Still got a glimpse, but that's about it. We also made a quick drive-by of the Smithsonian & Capital - two SUPER cool buildings.

The following day of training wrapped early and we had some time to kill before leaving for the airport so we decided to soak up our last moments in DC and see as much more as we could (as tired as we were, it was worth it). So we wound up at the Arlington Cemetery where we got to see the infamous Tomb Of The Unknown Soldier & Kennedy Gravesite. Another super cool experience.

Of course, the time change REALLY screwed with me and I'm running on fumes at the moment (it's just past 9pm on a Friday night and I'm in bed already.. holler!) but it was totally worth it to have crammed in as much as possible. Lots of hard work, airport delays, and a trash bag full of barf next to my face later (oh yeah, did I mention as our plane landed in Vegas a lady almost puked on me?) I'm home. I'm inspired and ready to keep tackling the next phase. I feel quite lucky.

Sometimes I wish I lived in the city.

You know, like New York City or LA. Somewhere in the heart of the bustling crowds where everyone walks and everything is local (I think I've officially decided I'm a city girl).

But then I look up and I'm shocked to realize - I do live in what I just described. I'm living downtown in a big city where there's bustling crowds and everyone walks and everything is local. In fact, this is my current view, right this second as I write this:

But what's even more awesome about where I live is that it's constantly buzzing with new excitement. Everyday a new business opens or a new restaurant begins construction. This is a big deal for a city that's widely viewed as "depressed" and in dire need of revitalization. There's so many big things happening in downtown Las Vegas and it's fun to watch and be a part of. I get to experience it all as it's happening, living right in the heart of it. Like today, I went to the grand opening of another brand new restaurant in town. How cool will it be to look back in 20 years to see how this city has changed and grown, and how all the "new" restaurants have become local gems over time. I'll get to look back and say, "I was there when..."

Sometimes I think I take the little things like this for granted because I get wrapped up in personal issues or work stress or wondering if I'll ever date again. But it's pretty incredible when I finally take a minute to stop and take a look around me. I'm lucky to be where I am at this point in my life. I don't know how I managed to get here, but I'm grateful that I did.

Two Types of Waiting.

"There are two types of waiting. 

There is the waiting you do for something you know is coming, sooner or later - like waiting for the 6.28 train or the school bus, or the party where a certain handsome boy might be. 

And then there's the waiting for something you don't know is coming. You don't even know what it is exactly, but you're hoping for it. You're imagining it and living your life for it. 

That's the kind of waiting that makes a fist in your heart."

Reality Check: I'm alone.

I often read posts from old college friends who are so vulnerable with their writing. They put it all out there and wear their hearts on their sleeves, not giving a damn that the one person it's likely about is probably going to be reading it. It doesn't phase them because they genuinely don't care if that person sees it. I admire that so much. I wish I had that kind of vulnerable, don't-give-a-damn attitude about everything I say and do.

I find myself holding back with my writing because I have a few people on the list that I'm not very comfortable with knowing exactly how I feel. Maybe I like keeping a little mystery or maybe I'm just scared to lay it all out there. The back-end of my blog has probably 20 unpublished posts in the last month alone. 

Anyways, I guess I felt the urge to do a little bit of a heart to heart, inspired by a recent post I read by an old college friend. Here goes: A few nights ago I was referred to as "the single one" by a waitress while out to dinner with some friends who happen to be couples. While it was actually pretty funny when it happened, I've never been more aware of the lack of romance in my life until then.

And to be honest.. I'm starting to feel pretty lonely. That night it was brought to the forefront with the "single one" comment and hasn't left my head since. It's not a big deal. I'm not even saying I need or want someone. It's just a sad reality that ALL my friends are couples and I actually AM the lone "single one." They never make me feel like a 5th wheel by any means, but they all get to go home to someone at night. They have someone to spend time with on the weekends or miss when they're gone. And me? I don't have that. And sometimes it stings.

But what stings even more is that little voice in the back of my mind that keeps saying "get used to it, Chels, because it might not ever happen for you again." I hate that voice. And hey, I know I'm only 23 and that's way too young to be giving up on the idea of ever finding someone. Trust me, you don't have to tell me that. I get it. I know. But I can't help but evaluate my past relationships and mistakes and feel like I got the short end of the romantic stick. Why does everyone else get to move on and be happy and I get to stay alone and sad?

I've gone through a lot of changes in the past year and a half. I've taken risks I didn't even know I had in me. I'm a different person now than I was in any of my past relationships. I've learned a lot and made changes and I'm a much happier person in general. I've got a lot to look forward to in the coming months and I'm surrounded by a really healthy and exciting atmosphere with incredible people. For all the great things I have going on, I've been floating on cloud nine. Except for that voice that periodically reminds me that I'm still alone and have been for a long, long time.

Beginning of the end?

I wrote this a few feeks ago but never got around to publishing it. I didn't feel like the time was right to share it, but it feels right now. Here goes.

I'm sure if you've looked at my blog even once over the past 9 months you may have grasped the nightmare I've had to deal with involving my car accident, insurance companies, treatment, and now attorneys. It's been an absolute nightmare following me around every single day for the last 9 months as I have to relive the accident for each new doctor or lawyer or insurance rep I'm passed around to. Every day has felt like an uphill battle trying to recover from this experience and move on with my life.

So after numerous battles with insurance companies who relentlessly screwed me over for months on end, I finally came to my senses and stopped letting them run me around. I lawyered up and let my attorney take it from there while his number one goal has been to help me get past this and get better. And now that brings us to today.

To ease the worsening pain in my neck from the accident, I had facet joint injections yesterday morning. It's a procedure where they put me out and injected 5 needles into my neck with some special sauce to help me be able to do simple everyday things like:

• Turn my head to the right
• Carry a bag over my right shoulder
• Not get debilitating migraines every single day
• Not have my arm go numb halfway through the day

After a lot of thought and conversations with multiple doctors, friends, and family members, I decided to go through with this procedure even though I was incredibly scared. I woke up after a lousy night's sleep feeling anxious and on the verge of tears. I'm actually not gonna lie here, when they laid me face down on the surgery bed to start the procedure I was full on crying (luckily no one saw because my face was buried in a sheet).

But let me explain the reason behind this. Was I crying because I was scared? Yes, absolutely. But it was also because I'm beyond ready for this to be over. I so badly want to leave this #1 horrible experience from 2012 (and basically my entire life up to this point) in the past. I don't want to be in pain anymore. I want to finally be able to move on with my life without this giant black car-accident cloud floating over my head. I'm tired of reliving this incident over and over again because it takes me to a dark corner of my mind that I don't want to be in. So today as I was laying face first on the surgery bed (is that the technical term?) waiting for the anesthesia to kick in, I cried out of hope that this day would finally be the beginning of the end.

*Note: 2.5 weeks after this procedure and I can confidently say it feels like I'm starting my trek through the downward slope of this mountain. Fingers crossed.

Changes.

Lots of things have been happening in my life. And I don't mean the typical roller coaster of ups and downs that I typically experience in any given month. But I realize I haven't documented any of this and I'm not quite sure why, to be honest. Maybe I've been busy or just haven't thought about it? There's no real reason, it just is what it is. But I'm here now and I have the urge to let the old fingers flow so let's talk about the last couple months, shall we?

First of all, January was kind of the same bust it usually is. Blah, blah, blah, I hate winter, yadda yadda yadda, I had to drop $1,000 on my car, shmee shmee shmee. It actually was much better than previous January's have been, though. If you've been around long enough, you've probably heard me at LEAST once refer to the epic (and inevitable) "January 2nd Meltdown" I face each year. You know, the one where I've just come off another New Years Eve spent on the couch with my mom watching Grey's Anatomy DVD's and then reevaluate every single one of my past life decisions that have led me to this point. It's really unnecessary, but again happens every year. January 2nd. Without fail.

This year, I braced myself for it, knowing full well it was coming. But it didn't come. New Year's eve was the most fun I've probably ever spent ringing in a new year and January 2nd came and left without a single tear or a single "WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE" thought. And I didn't even notice (in a good way). It actually felt great when I realized mid-January that I skipped over that annual event, and I think I know why it didn't happen: I'm happy. For once, the bleak mid-winter has not brought me down into a cold, freezing hole of dramatic reflection, and thank the lord. For once I got to enjoy January without the fear of spending the first half of the year bored and cold and sad. Vegas, you've already won me over for 2013.

And it helped that I had a LOT to look forward to in January. For starters, I was getting ready to finally move out of my parents house. Look people, this was a really big deal for me. I realize that pretty much everyone (except the really, really lucky few) have to move back in with their parents after college. I was fine with it. I like my parents and I'm kind of a homebody, so I was fine. But after a while I got a little self-conscious telling people I still lived with mommy and daddy. Not that anyone ever made me feel that way or called me out on it, but I was just so ready to start being independent and take the next big step forward in my life, and that all started with moving out.

So come February 1st, that's exactly what I did. I moved to Downtown Las Vegas with a friend and co-worker, Leah. We live about a 10 minute walk from work, right in the heart of Downtown. We get to be where the action is and no longer have to drive the dreaded 15 minute commute back to Summerlin on Friday nights when all we want to do is have a drink after a long week at work. Score.

We owe a huge thanks to both of our parents and our co-workers (and new Downtown neighbors) Julie & TJ for helping us get moved in. With their help, the process was expedited and we were in our new place in no time. And now, here we are, enjoying every second of our chic new living space (that actually turned out to be more spacious than we were anticipating). It's been a perfect fit so far and both Leah and I are thrilled to be settled into our Downtown digs.

Shortly after moving we took a little (working) trip to LA (again, if you know me at all you know I love me some la la land - 8 trips last year, what what??) to see Ellie Goulding perform at the Palladium. I got to spend some time with Cory and see one of my favorite artists live which was pretty amazing. Working from LA was a little bit more stressful than I anticipated though - sadly, my true colors were exposed while stuck in a horrendous wifi situation and everyone around me saw the rage that ensues when I don't have working internet. Oops. Trying to just own it as a Chelsea-flaw, but shit, I need to work on my anger sometimes (another story for another blog post).

Anyways, I'm happily back in Vegas now, skipped over Valentine's Day again, and have a terrible cold at the moment, but life is good. I'm happy and taking care of business. This year is already bringing about so many awesome opportunities in all different areas of my life and I couldn't be more excited to just live in the moment and enjoy things as they happen. Life's good.